Behind the Facemask is a raw, unfiltered memoir of survival, addiction, anger, and the brutal work of becoming a present father and a decent man. Anthony James Hodel grew up learning to keep his guard up and his fists ready. Success came fast—business wins, money, attention—but the past never let go. Rage detonated relationships. Addiction stole time he’ll never get back. Courtrooms, custody battles, and nights he can’t forget pushed him to the edge.

This book is the full reckoning. Hodel tells the truth about shame, trauma, and the way pain finds pain. He writes about three children he loves and the distance that broke him open, the “circus life” years, the mirror that never lied, and the long climb up a Redemption Stairway he built one Tuesday at a time.

Woven through the chapters are brief insights from psychologist Dr. Dwyer—clear, compassionate notes on trauma, attachment, anger, and what repair really requires—plus practical moves anyone can use: scripts for apologies, boundaries that hold, and small routines that build trust.

If you’ve lived through abuse, wrestled with addiction, or ruined the very things you swore to protect, this book will feel like someone finally said the quiet part out loud. It doesn’t promise easy redemption. It offers something harder, and better: a way forward.

Listen to this if you’re ready to take the mask off—and do the work that keeps it off.