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The Slacker's Guide to Galactic Bureaucracy

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The Slacker's Guide to Galactic Bureaucracy

De: Julian Venn
Narrado por: Nicholas Gagne
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First contact was a bug. Saving humanity is going to ruin his nap schedule.

For Fitzwilliam 'Fitz' Chen, the biggest bug in his life was a misplaced comma, not an intergalactic distress signal. His perfectly calibrated world of naps and minimal effort shatters when a clueless alien race, the Phlibb, mistake his smart-home glitch for a cry for help. Now, as Earth's accidental First Contact Liaison, Fitz faces the ultimate disruption: saving humanity from well-meaning cosmic chaos.

The Phlibb, led by the perpetually optimistic Ambassador Xylos, are here to "optimize" Earth, starting with Fitz's apartment and local coffee shop. Their benevolent interventions quickly escalate from minor annoyances to potentially catastrophic global "improvements." With only his sardonic neighbor, a vintage arcade owner, and his own coding apathy to rely on, Fitz needs to de-escalate this interstellar misunderstanding.

Fitz views this whole alien invasion as an exceptionally irritating, high-priority bug in his personal operating system. He must navigate ludicrous galactic bureaucracy and the very real threat of exposing humanity, all while desperately trying to salvage his sacred nap schedule. Can a master of strategic underachievement really outwit an entire alien civilization?

The fate of humanity, or at least its glorious inefficiency, rests on Fitz's ability to overcome his cynicism. Will he embrace the chaotic beauty of human imperfection, or will he let the Phlibb "fix" Earth into oblivion?

©2026 Julian Venn (P)2026 Julian Venn
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