Otto Handley

In the surreal academic landscape of Tumbarumba, history professor Stella Pontifex discovers that grease is not merely a culinary byproduct but a metaphysical archive of human memory. As the world suffers from “The Great Sizzle” and a subsequent “thinning” of reality known as attenuation...

Where do we go after we die? In this story the protagonist, Oscar Whatmore, dies and finds himself transported to a rundown spiritual realm, eventually appearing before a vast court presided over by a diminutive and disagreeable Jesus clad in legal robes. Although judged worthy of admission to...

Pope Blatantly IV wishes to return to the papal autocracy of the Middle Ages. He devises a threefold plan: 1) to enforce universal Catholic geographical supremacy, 2) to criminalize sin, and 3) to ban “grease” in favor of doctrinal “dryness.” The Pope’s outlandish initiatives include...

Archibald Abercrombie is a meticulous dentist whose orderly life is briefly upended after a chance meeting with the exuberant writer G. K. Chesterton. While initially intoxicated by Chesterton’s brilliant paradoxes and disregard for convention, Abercrombie gradually notices the physical decay...

This pseudo-theological narrative chronicle details the spiritual journey of a man named Glen, who is called to become The Fryer, a prophet of viscosity and fried food. Included among the significant issues and events are The Fryer’s initial revelation, a growing understanding of the doctrine...

Edgar Blunt is an ordinary man who discovers an annotated anthology of philosophy and becomes obsessed with achieving Aristotelian virtue through rigid, literal interpretations of concepts like potentiality and the Golden Mean. Edgar’s attempts to mathematically calibrate his friendships, diet...

Our story begins with the programmer, Allosaurus Triplicate, who inadvertently creates the Realm of the Unwritten—a dimension populated by unfinished and deleted text fragments that achieve sentience, including the letter V. This symbolic dimension soon descends into turmoil through the...

This is the story of a theological conflict concerning the concepts of “grace” versus “grease.” The “cult of Frank,” a religious movement advocating the salvific potential of viscosity, frying, and culinary lubrication is gaining many converts. The story opens with a sermon by Father...

The Wombat Ultimatum describes a chaotic societal crisis following the kidnapping of the adverb “Softly” by marsupial revolutionaries. The main conflict pits the prophetic tobacconist and wombat leader Runciman, who champions “blunt grammar” and the rejection of all adverbs, against the...

A metaphysical crisis occurs when the note C sharp mysteriously vanishes after being played perfectly by the pianist Jonathan Blenheim. The absence causes tonal collapse worldwide, leading to chaos in orchestras and triggering a bureaucratic panic at the Bureau of Eclectic Notation (BEN). The...

The Fryer Ascends is a theological and culinary epic detailing a conflict between the forces of flavor and imperfection (represented by the prophets Frank and Glen the Fryer) and the forces of order and blandness (led by the metaphysical entity Softly, the Adverb, and the Bureau of Blandness)...

This is the story of Gregory Thistlethwaite, an unremarkable student, who is commanded by an authoritative, disembodied voice—claiming to be Jordan Peterson—to clean his room as a metaphorical path to ontological and psychological order. We track Gregory’s progress through increasingly...